Currently listening: S/mileage - aMa no Jaku / MM Gakuen Gasshoubu - Kirei in Naritai
Currently reading: Dramacon Ultimate Edition
Currently watching: Pokemon videos & clips on YouTube
Current obsessions: Aya Matsuura, Erina Mano, Code Geass (EuphiexSuzaku <3333), Dramacon, Pokemon
Mood: Happy, Tired, Meh

Holy fudge cupcakes, long time no blog. I missed blogging so much. My freshman year of college consumed my life and these past few months I drowned in papers, Japanese shukudai, and Touchstone layout ;_;. I have barely enough time to sleep and each, let alone blog. I became the Features/Editorial editior of Touchstone (Yay!!), so I'd have late nights doing layout, and then afterwards I'd get back to my room and still have homework. Seriously, the entire last month I went to bed at like 4 or 6:30 in the morning XD. But it, even though the year had its ups and down it was still fun, I suppose. I've met some great friends, so thats good, and I really love working on Touchstone and Graffiti, especially since its going to help me with my writing. Plus, all my hard work paid off - my overall average was a 3.8 and I have like 50-something credits. Go me :)

Now that the summer's here I am on concentrating on a lot of things. I've been working at the pizzeria on Fridays and Sundays, so I've been making some cash there. I signed up to take an Italian class (Italian Conversation 2) at WCC which doesn't start until July, and I'm actually leaving for a two week vacation to Italy tomorrow! :) It was very unexpected - I know my Dad planned on going because he wanted to go out to work on the apartment we have up here, but he told me last week I could go with him, and then two days later we booked the tickets ^^; And I'm leaving tomorrow, returning on the 26th. At first I was guilty and stunned that my Dad said I could go, but now I'm really really excited! I'm so stoked to see the family again, and it'll be nice to just chillax in Anagni for two weeks. Plus, I can look for more Scegli Me! manga :D The timing is also good because I can use my Italian and get back into speaking just in time for my class.

In addition to keeping up with my Italian and having a sort of job, what I really want to do this summer, the two  things that I am focusing on are 1) writing and 2) improving myself. First, writing. I don't know why but my creative writing class sent me into a bit of a slump. I somehow lost my writing muse, and I determined to find it again. I don't know where it went, but I lost the thrill I get - the arlenaline rushing through my reins that tells me "I can do this" and lets me know that I'm on a roll. I find myself question myself, asking "Is this a good story idea?" "Will people like it?",. I feel like I'm at a point where I can't think of a good idea and I wonder if I will ever writing something again, and my fire dies before I can lite it. I hate being at this point, I hate doubting myself. So this summer I can going to try really hard and writing a novel in a month, or at least by the end of the summer (Need to prep for Narrative Writing anyway). I know I can write and I know I love to write, so I just need to dig deep, get out of this rut, and overcome this cloud of writers block that has been raining over me. Perhaps being away for a while will help clear my mind... too bad I'll have to go old school with a pen and paper while in Italy because my mom needs my laptop here T_T.

But yeah - writing is my number 1 priority. Next is my self image. I really dislike the way I look, the way I eat, my hair, my teeth, my skin, everything. I want to be thinner, prettier, healthier - I look at girls in Hello! Project and the actresses in my K-dramas and think "I want to look like them. I want to be that thin.". And so when I get back I'm giving myself a total makeover. I'm going to get my hair cut and do highlights, I have a few dentist appointments lined up, and I'm going to work out everyday. I seriously wish I could just eat whatever and not have to worry about gaining weight because I love food so much - it's not like I even eat a lot, and I don't eat junk food at all - but I think if I just drink more water, have stronger will power, eat more fruits and veggies, and exercise every day, I can do it <3 I hate myself the way I look right now, so I really want to become prettier and thinner.

So yup, that's basically what's up with me right now. I really hope this summer turns out to be a great one; a summer where I can change myself and writing some of my best material ever. Oh and remember how I was mentioning buying a Mac or a smaller laptop to carry around with me for writing purposes? Well I actually ordered a netbook a few weeks ago, and I can't wait until it arrives! It's a Dell Mini 10, so cute! I talked about it with my mom and was telling her how I wanted something to take around with me so I can type and have somethign on me for whenever inspiration strikes. Its good, because I won't have outside distractions with a netbook, since I'll solely be using it for writing and possibily checking emails. I paid more than normal people pay for a netbook because I gave it the best settings I could and had to install Microsoft Basic since it didn't come with Word initially, but I'm still never happy I got it. I really can't wait until it arrives - I have a feeling I can really get a lot more work done with it.

I can already see now that I have a busy summer ahead of me ^^; See you in two weeks! <3

PS I want a boyfriend sooooooooo bad ;_; Someone just like Suzaku would be great ^__^

PPS Euphie x Suzaku are the cutest anime couple ever <333333333333333